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That better post I was promising…

So I had a bit of a rough week last week.

Or, rather, I should say that the last half of it or so was kinda rough. I was very anxious to hear back about the Internship of My Life, and I was supposed to hear back from it Friday.

I was not rejected, but the response I got was not satisfying, delaying this process of admission even more rather than giving me an answer.

It was on Monday that I had a realization that even if I got the internship, it was highly possible that I would be placed in a town in the middle of nowhere, and I would be facing the same kind of loneliness and boredom that I did last summer. I am very much afraid of that. Like… whoa.

Anyway, those were sort of the operative things going on in my life, not to mention that I had stuff due for my classes and was almost unable to focus on anything past Friday.

So, I was kinda stressed. And where did I turn?

Yes, the ice cream.

If we remember from a previous post, ice cream has never been a big vice of mine. There’s a point which sweet things just make me nauseous, and I don’t enjoy them as much.

But sugar still ups the dopamine-thingies in the body, so eating ice cream, even if I don’t like it that much, still makes me feel better. So, yeah, I had quite a bit of ice cream last week.

It’s pretty depressing to think that you have at least somewhat handled your stress eating problems and then to  realize that all you’ve done at this point was replace the potatoes and salty things with something that you don’t even like as much.

Needless to say I was — am — frustrated. The ice cream and the stress are likely the reasons why I didn’t lose much weight this week.

Of course, the thing that I really need for stress is exercise, and that’s the one thing I really can’t do. Sure, I could go swimming or rowing or lift weights or some such, but… I dunno. I feel like it’s not the same. I do TKD because I intrinsically enjoy it, and I feel like exercising out of obligation or to intentionally relieve stress would only add to it. Maybe I haven’t really given it enough of a chance, but the reason why doing TKD is stress-relieving for me is because I like it so much. There is the added exercise component to it that does help, but I feel like doing something I don’t enjoy just to get rid of stress would be counter-productive.

Finals are around the corner, and I can only imagine my anxiety and stress will increase. I have taken to doing pushups when I get cravings, so perhaps that will help. I don’t know for sure, but I know that, along with potatoes, ice cream is now off the menu.



On Frustrations and Chicken Soup

I’m sure many of you notice that my daily postings were interrupted yesterday. Many of you, I’m sure, kept a tab open of this blog and refreshed it every few hours, and every few hours you were disappointed. For that, my dear readers, I apologize.

Let me explain.

As I mentioned in my post the other day, I had a really bad night at TKD on Wednesday. Perhaps it was because I had eaten right before going or the fact that I hadn’t had enough water that day, but either way, my belt test is on Saturday (tomorrow — eep!) and it was not encouraging to have a bad day right before.

So I woke up yesterday morning, resolved to eat more calories (as I was convinced that was the issue). The only problem was that I wasn’t hungry. I scrambled up three eggs, as was my usual custom,  but I couldn’t eat them. I ditched them and tried eating the soup that I had made the night before and was still unsuccessful. I also tried to search for recipes to use to make a cooking list with, and was very unsuccessful at that.

It was at this point that I got so frustrated and stressed that I started cleaning my apartment.

Laugh if you will, but I have found that cleaning things is a good distraction when I am stressed/distressed/upset. So I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned. Then, low and behold, my coach popped up on facebook and asked me how things were going. After a relatively short conversation, we decided that getting up to that magic 1300 mark isn’t necessary, and that I should just focus on eating when I’m hungry.

I do feel a lot better about that, though I am still going to the grocery store today, resolving to eat meat AND fruits/veggies with every  meal, and still trying to reset my sleep clock. Just because those are generally good things to do.

For some reason, I forgot my general philosophy: “trust your body.” Other than being generally overweight/obese, my body and I have a generally okay relationship, and it tells me what it needs, and generally I listen. I am not sure why I thought this would, could, or should be any different. My body hates eating when I get up, and if I do eat, I generally can’t eat protein — either fruit or bread. So that’s what I’m going to do.

Anyway, onto food.

Yesterday, as mentioned, I had maybe an egg and a half and a few spoonfuls of a new chicken soup that I made, in the morning. Around four I got hungry so I had two cups of the spicy tomato soup, which was uber tasty. Finally, around seven or eight I had half a pound of baked chicken and a magic salad.

So let’s introduce this soup I made.


Hello, my name is...

The other night I was grumpy and frustrated from TKD, not hungry  but needing to eat something, and most of what I had left was two pounds of chicken and some veggies.  I really didn’t want to have another baked-meat-with-marinade meal (as I’ve pretty  much been doing…), so after a couple hours (no, really) of hem-hawing, I decided to try and make soup.  I found a recipe online for chicken noodle soup and decided to change it up.

8 cups fat free chicken broth
1 cup chopped celery
1 cup chopped carrots
3/4 cup chopped onions
2 cups (about 1 lb) diced, cooked chicken

Seasoned pepper, onion powder, to taste.

Cook the chicken in whatever way you would like (I generally pan-cook mine), seasoned with the garlic powder and seasoned pepper, or however you like.


The chicken eagerly awaits...

In large saucepan, bring broth and italian seasoning to a boil. Stir in celery, onion, and carrots. Reduce heat, cover, and simmer for 15 minutes.

When veggies are tender, add chicken and cook till heated.

Number of Servings: 6

What the recipe doesn’t say, because I took it out, is that I added like… 1/6 of a cup of italian dressing to the soup.

I’m pretty sure, at this juncture, that that is what ruined it for me.

That and the spongy nature of the pan-fried chicken. It’s just… weird.

I will probably try to pawn it off on Anthony when he gets here, or perhaps Darcy would like it. We shall see, but I probably won’t have anymore.

FINALLY, I have been able to locate some recipes that look pretty good, on the site everyday paleo. I’ve got my grocery list worked out and I’m ready to go. So hopefully, that will work out very well. 🙂

Sorry for the long post — I had a bit on my mind.